So you want to date, but no one seems to notice you. And while your classmates are busy trading jerseys and class rings, you’re feeling more and more like a nobody. Do you sit around feeling sorry for yourself? No way! God has better plans for you. Here are tips on how to wait for a date.

1. Don’t Compare Yourself to Others

She was my rival all through grade school. I competed with her at everything. Then came high school, where athletics and grades take a back seat to good looks and popularity. I was shy; she was outgoing. I was plain; she was pretty. Needless to say, she got all the dates.

It wasn’t until I stopped comparing myself that I became content with who I was. I realized it was my inner qualities that truly mattered. At times you too may wish you were thinner, prettier, or had nicer clothes. Thoughts like that breed discontentment. Outer beauty may gain you popularity, but it doesn’t bring happiness. 

God has given you a uniqueness all of your own. Don’t waste time trying to be like someone else. Instead, develop the qualities He has given you. Keep your eyes on Christ, and let the real you shine. I guarantee someone will notice…and for the right reasons! 

2. Dare to Be Different

Being different means being an outsider, right? Wrong! It means standing by your convictions, being strong enough to resist temptation, and big enough to admit you’re wrong when you make a mistake.

Joseph was only 17 when he was sold into Egypt (Genesis 39). But when his boss’ wife tried to seduce him, he knew better than to cave. And when she wouldn’t take no for an answer, Joseph didn’t walk away…he ran!

Now getting in good with the boss’ wife could have given Joseph a lot of leverage, not to mention a huge ego boost. But Joseph dared to be different, and God blessed him for it.

The time may come when you too will have to stand against a wrong. Like when you’re invited to a weekend bash where everybody who’s anybody is going to be. It could do wonders for your dating possibilities. But there will be drinking, drugs, even sex. Refusing to go won’t win you popularity, but who knows whose respect you’ll gain?

3. Count Your Parents in

When you’re faced with a tough situation, who do you turn to? Friends? Social media?

Or do you retreat into your room, hoping your problems will disappear? How about your parents? Where do they fit in?

Prom, my junior year. The halls were buzzing with talk of who was taking whom. But while my friends were buying fancy dresses and deciding where to go after the dance, I was sulking. 

When my dad caught wind I wasn’t going, he got the bright idea to escort me himself. “I can’t go with my dad. Everyone will laugh!” I protested. 

But the night of the prom found me dressed in my sister’s hand-me-down formal with my father. To his credit, he stayed on the sidelines until I was ready to leave. No one ever said a word.

Looking back now, it isn’t the embarrassment of not having a date I remember, but my dad’s love and commitment. Confiding in your parents may sound lame, but remember—they were once teens themselves. They may have wisdom that could save you some heartache.

Maybe your parents have troubles of their own, and you can’t depend on them. Then find someone you can depend on…a pastor, youth sponsor, or teacher…someone you can trust to help you face tough decisions. Why not seek help from someone who’s been there, and knows the ropes?

4. Think Friendship—Not Romance

The sexual drive is at its peak during the teen years. So it’s hard to keep it in first gear when your hormones are on overdrive. Teens who date heavily put themselves in compromising situations far too often. But what about those left out of the dating scene? Are they destined to a life of misery? 

I had only one date during high school with a boy I’d met at church camp. We barely knew each other. Yet somehow that didn’t seem important. The night of our date—a double date with two of his friends, I was super excited…or so I thought. We weren’t gone long, however, before I realized the flare of camp was gone, and I was at a theater with a guy I hardly knew. I panicked when I saw his friends all over eachother…wondering if I was expected to do the same.

Three years passed before I went on another date, but this time I was wise enough to begin as friends. Developing a friendship with someone before becoming romantically involved allows you the freedom to be yourself. Take time to get to know each other before you jump into a steady relationship. And if all you have during high school is friendships, that’s okay. Not everyone is ready to date the second they hit puberty. Don’t allow your peers to pressure you into doing something you don’t want to or might regret.

Dating can be fun, but it has its down sides, such as the emotional scars of breakups. Difficult as it is to feel left out, it’s much worse to carry around guilt and heartache from soured relationships.

Though I waited nearly ten years after high school for my husband, I’m proud to say we kept ourselves exclusively for each other. Sure there were lonely times, but such a precious gift was worth the wait!

The ABC’s of Salvation

Admit that you’re a sinner. 

“For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard.” (Romans 3:23)

Believe in Jesus. 

“But to all who believed Him and accepted Him, He gave the right to become children of God.” (John 1:12)

Commit your life to Christ. 

“Lord Jesus,

I admit that I am a sinner. It is only through Jesus’ death on the cross that I can be saved, and through His resurrection that I can have a relationship with You. 

Please forgive me of all my sin. Come into my life, and help me to live for You.

In Jesus’ name, Amen.”