Do you struggle with communication? Communication is one of the most important skills you can learn. This useful and vital skill enhances and brings greater connection to relationships. Healthy communication encourages respect and understanding. It reduces conflict. It builds trust. Excellent communication can help you professionally, too. 

It’s important to develop excellent communication skills and consider the context of each communication opportunity.  

How to Communicate Effectively

Know the setting. Adjust your communication based on the setting and context, while remaining authentic. For example, when at school, write professionally when communicating to school officials or faculty, avoiding several (and inappropriate) emojis. Communicate with respect. Instead of showing frustration, show courtesy.

Put your phone down. Putting your phone down can help with better communication and connection. Several studies have shown how excessive smartphone use (and phubbing, the act of snubbing people to focus on the phone) negatively affects communication and interpersonal relationships. Make eye contact and give undivided attention to show love and respect. Respond to people as soon as you can.  

Be a great listener. Say what you want to say but be willing to listen and learn. The Bible provides several verses to help us follow this. Proverbs 18:15 says, “An intelligent heart acquires knowledge, and the ear of the wise seeks knowledge” (ESV). Scripture also tell us to be quick to listen, slow to speak and to anger since the wrath of man doesn’t produce the righteousness of God (James 1:19-20). Proverbs 17:28 says, “Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent” (ESV). You are certainly wise when you fear the Lord, so you want to be keeping quiet and listening when you need to. 

But Why Communicate Effectively?

When you focus on the conversation and what someone is saying, you’re not only physically hearing what the person is saying but discerning and listening to what the person might not be audibly saying. You listen to the heart; you’re able to see the expressions of the person and know exactly what the person feels even if they aren’t saying it. 

In the professional world, employers appreciate excellent communication. If you’re able to master excellent communication skills now (which is tied with interpersonal relationships, because you can only have a healthy interpersonal relationships through the process of communication), you’ll be able to get along well with your colleagues and supervisors. In addition to having less miscommunication, misunderstandings and conflicts, you’re less likely to seem out of place with communication practices that don’t fit the right context. 

How To Connect with Others Using Tech

Social media. You can decide to use social media, but limit its usage and connect more with people in person. Being in people’s presence that makes a difference: Seeing their smile (or frown) can help you understand what the person is saying and can encourage you. 

When connecting online with others, connect genuinely. Talk or write to them as you would if you were to be in person. 

Emails. Emails are best for professional communication. Communicate with your employers and prospective employers through emails. You can also communicate with your professors or teachers through them. It’s better to keep your communication formal, unless you have a strong relationship with the other person. Proofread to appear professional. 

Phone or Text. Phone calls can be useful to understand someone better when emails don’t work, are intimidating, or seem distant. 

Hearing someone’s voice can enhance the communication process. It can also make you feel closer to the person—especially when the person lives far away. For instance, when you’re away from home, and you know your parents (and grandparents) aren’t on social media, phone calls with them can be extra comforting. You can learn and benefit from your parents’ (or grandparents’) wisdom, especially while away at college. 

You could also stay in touch with your friends and more distant family through texting or WhatsApp. Texting can be a way to get in touch immediately with your family and friends while away from home. It can also allow the other person who might be busy at the moment to either write back with a simple acknowledgment of your message through reactions or a quick response. Text messages are better reserved for friends and family or people you have grown closer to. 

Video Calls. Better still is the idea of video calls with apps like FaceTime and even WhatsApp video calls. Video calls allow for a simulation of the real world in-person interactions we used to enjoy so freely before the global pandemic and  social distancing. Video calls allow for a closer connection because of how similar they are to real life interactions. You can schedule them to connect with others who are miles away from you.

Implementing these tips to communicate effectively takes intentionality. Indeed, everyone can communicate, but communicating effectively takes knowledge, skill, and practice. Yet, you can do it! 

This article was originally titled “Words That Bond” in the February 2025 issue of Peer Magazine.